[House talks to Concerned Mom who thinks that her daughter has epilepsy]
Dr. House: In actuality all your little girl is doing is… saying yoo hoo to the hoo hoo.
Concerned Mom: She’s what?
Dr. House: Marching the penguin… ya ya-ing the sisterhood… finding Nemo?
Little Girl Patient: [giggles] That was funny.
Dr. House: It’s called gratification disorder, sort of a misnomer. If one was unable to gratify oneself, that would be a disorder.
Concerned Mom:[covering little girl’s ears] Are you saying she’s masturbating?
Dr. House: [making fun of the mother by talking out of the corner of his mouth so the little girl supposedly won’t see that he’s talking] I was trying to be discreet. There’s a child in the room.
Concerned Mom: Oh, this is horrifying.
Dr. House: Epilepsy is horrifying. Teach your girl about privacy and she’ll be fine.